PERSONALITY  QUIZ

Thirst is a shameless disease so here's to a shameful cure.

A Personality Quiz For The Spiritually Challenged


What does your drink say about you! Seven bartenders were asked if they could identify personality based on what drinks were chosen. Though interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts.

The results:

WOMEN

 Drink : Beer
 Personality : Casual, low-maintenance; down to earth.
 Approach : Challenge her to a game of pool.

 Drink : Blender drinks with umbrella
 Personality : Flaky, annoying, dizzy, and a pain in the ass
 Approach : Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy.

 Drink : Mixed drinks - no umbrellas
 Personality : Mature, has picky taste; knows what she wants.
 Approach : If she wants you, she'll send YOU a drink.

 Drink : Wine - (bottled not 4 litre cask)
 Personality : Conservative and classy, sophisticated. (Pretentious)
 Approach : Try and weave Paris and clothing into the conversation.

 Drink : Barcardi Breezer - Hooch
 Personality : Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated, actually has absolutely
                     no clue
 Approach : Make her feel smarter than she is...and you're in.

 Drink : Shorts (Vodka, Gin etc.)
 Personality : Hanging with boy pals or looking to get drunk...and naked.
 Approach : Easiest hit in the joint. Nothing to do but wait.
 

 MEN - as always, very simple and clear cut.

Cheap Domestic Beer : He's poor and wants to get laid.

Premium Local Beer : He likes good beer and wants to get laid.

Imported Beer : He likes expensive beer and wants to get laid

Guinness : The man is a rapist and will get laid one way or another.

Wine : He's hoping that the wine thing will give him a sophisticated
image and help him get laid.

Vodka : Extremely horny hound, would shag a warm scarf. Desperate to get
 laid.

Whisky : He doesn't give two shits about anything and will hit anyone
who will get in his way of getting laid.

Southern Comfort : Not as masculine as the whisky drinker, knows all
about feminine activities (knitting, crochet etc.) to weasel himself into 
getting laid.

Tequila : Piss off, all you wankers, I'm gonna go shag something with a
pulse. (obviously from Barrow-in-Furness or the far North of Scotland)

Barcardi Breezer - Hooch : He's gay

 

The above survey is definitely not meant as a scientific study but as most bartenders and waiters know,  there is a distinct correlation between rowdiness, unruly behavior and out and out nutcases on nights when there is a full moon.  So, there is likely a nugget of truth in here somewhere.